04 July 2008

Bad Daddy

pickles and lucy saying good bye to their daddy

This picture was taken of my beloved darling dogs as I was literally walking out the door on Wednesday.
They were wondering where I was going with my suitcases.
My dogs are VERY smart indeed. They know me like no one else does.
I broke down in tears tonight at dinner with M thinking about them.
I feel so guilty.
So fucking guilty.
The farm was huge, and now they are in a smallish flat in Sydney.
I feel like a failure who abandoned his dogs.
But I could not live in Sydney again.
My ex of almost twenty years is there. Bless him.
And I reckon I need a fresh break away from that very emotional commitment.
WE all deserve a new beginning.
I just wish I could have my dogs with me.
The pain is too deep at times.
Tears are streaming down my face and I can't control them.
Even though they are LOVED, no one could ever love them like I did and do.
I raised them. I nurtured them and they nurtured me.

I know the last few posts have been aggressive readers, and I am sorry for that.

But I am pretty pissed off at the moment over a few things.

So its just way things are at the moment.

We all have to deal.
blog comments powered by Disqus